Things Only Longhorns Understand

Being a part of the Longhorn family means understanding certain things that most people don’t find important. We take pride in not only the big things, but also the little things. If you don’t bleed orange, don’t even try to understand.

1. Burnt orange has basically become a wardrobe primary color

There is no “burnt orange doesn’t look good on me”. There aren’t moments of “I can’t match ANYTHING with burnt orange”. Burnt orange has just become a good portion of your closet. And you’re okay with that.

2. Tailgating is not an event, it’s a lifestyle

When will people realize this?! It’s not a choice on whether you want to go tailgating or not for all of the football home games. It’s a decision on where you want to end up on the UT Tailgating map. Usually influenced by what selection of food will be available, and what other college football games will be playing. The more flat screens, the better.

3. Parallel parking is a piece of a cake

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You’ve already mastered this. You were forced to.

4. 4th of July fireworks are just a tease

After seeing a UT graduation show, all other firecrackers seem sub par. Once again, Longhorn nation setting the bar just a little bit higher. I’m pretty sure we give Disney a running for their money.

5. Having more pets with names that represent UT than actual degrees from UT

Bevo, Hook ’em, Tex, etc. Fur babies serve as yet another way to express obsessive pride with UT. Plus, how cute are those little outfits the Co-op makes?!

6. Having a whole new meaning for the phrase “little fish in a big pond”

It doesn’t even phase us anymore. It’s literally possible to wear pajamas to class without anyone noticing. Any ordinary day of class just feels like Black Friday all over again.

7. Austin withdrawals

Regardless if you’re from here or not. Regardless if you stay here after graduating or not. It has been scientifically proven that those who stray away from Austin for whatever reason, go through symptomatic Austin withdrawal. Outbreaks occur mainly during Football season and spring time.

8. The struggle of having to decide between ACL or OU weekend

Thankfully ACL got their shit together and created two weeks, so this is no longer as big of an issue. But man were those times hard. It’s basically un-American to have to choose between two of the most important weekends of the year.

9. Babies are capable of sign language at a much younger age than most think

Everyone should know that. It’s not “starting them early” if they are the ones making the decision. But of course there’s a lot of encouraging.

10. Mistaking the Olympics for a University sports event

Anybody else often times forget who you are supposed to be rooting for while watching the Olympics? “Oh wait, it’s our nation we are cheering on. Guess I forgot with all of the UT medals flowing in”. Mad RESPECT.

11. January 4, 2006

No need to explain this one. \m/ We love you Vince.

12.Tiff’s Treats has their own spot on the food pyramid

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I tried to go without these heavenly delights one semester to see if it was even possible. For all of you wondering, it’s not. Don’t even try. Am I the only one that has considered buying stock for this company?! If it’s wrong to eat my weight in Tiff’s Treats, well then hell, I don’t want to be right.

13. Anything is possible in a Dobie dorm room

Two words: Michael Dell. It’s true what they say. “What starts here really does change the world”. I mean, you can’t really argue with that, can you!?

14. Intramural championship shirts are hard to come by

These shirts are definitely a rarity. Making them way more valuable than a $10 t-shirt really should be. Let’s be honest, it’s really about the bragging rights.

15. The best lessons are taught by Navy Seals

It really is an honor to hear wise words from such a prestigious man. “If you want to change the world, start off by making your bed”.

16. Matthew McConaughey feels like a long-lost relative

But really. Are we related or something bro!? Or are you the undercover university vice president? Or our celebrity mascot? Nonetheless, we can’t get enough of you.

17. Hearing the word “strong” and immediately dreaming of football season

#stronghorns

18. Gregory gym has it’s very own rush hour

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And let me tell you, the struggle is most definitely real during those times. In my seven years spent at the university, I NEVER saw the weight room that empty. This is totally a misleading picture.

19. “Hook ’em” is an acceptable email signature

Why say sincerely when you can end an email with hook’ em?! No shame in my game.

20. Orange+ is a blood type 

Also scientifically proven. You don’t just chose to become a Longhorn. You ARE a Longhorn.

21. No one knows the extent of OU suckiness better than us

Other schools may agree with us. Some get pride out of doing the best they can to inform us that OU actually doesn’t suck (we like to laugh at these people). But in the end, no one will ever be able to know how much OU really sucks as well as we do. I mean, it’s what rivalry is all about.

There are just some things that only make sense to us Longhorns. And that’s okay. Because as I’ve stated before, there’s a reason we are better, different, and envied more than other schools.

Hook ’em! \m/

-Hayley Gail